Safer sex and condoms

Before you decide to have sex, talk to your sexual partner about safe sex. For protection against sexually transmitted infections, you should always use a condom.

Having safer sex

Safer sex can include:

  • using condoms or an oral dam during vaginal, oral or anal sex with every partner, every time
  • using condoms until you and your partner have been tested for sexually transmitted infections (STIs)
  • masturbating
  • kissing, licking, stroking, rubbing, cuddling and hugging
  • body massage.

Pregnancy

To prevent becoming pregnant, you will need to use a form of contraception. This is usually a condom or the oral contraceptive pill.

Contraceptive pills (internal link)

Sexually transmitted infections

For protection against sexually transmitted infections (STIs), you should always use a condom.

Condoms are the only type of contraception that can protect against STIs and prevent pregnancy.

Talk to your healthcare provider, Sexual Wellbeing Aotearoa, or a sexual health clinic about getting tested.

Protect yourself from sexually transmitted infections

Condoms can protect you from most sexually transmitted infections (STIs).

The more sexual partners you have without using condoms, the higher your risk of getting an STI.

Some STIs are spread by skin-to-skin contact. A condom or oral dam might not prevent this.

Using a condom is your best protection

Most people know that condoms can help protect them from getting an STI. Most people do not use condoms because they:

  • feel awkward about buying or carrying them
  • find them too expensive
  • are persuaded to have sex when they are not expecting to
  • are drunk or stoned and have less control
  • see condoms as a barrier to intimacy
  • think their partner is safe
  • are worried the ‘mood’ may be broken
  • are afraid to talk about using condoms in case their partner gets angry, abusive or leaves them.

Talk to your healthcare provider, Sexual Wellbeing Aotearoa, or a local sexual health clinic.

Early treatment of sexually transmitted infections

If you think you may have an STI, see your healthcare provider or sexual health clinic.

Many STIs do not have symptoms. If you do have symptoms, they may include:

  • unusual vaginal discharge
  • unusual urethral discharge (anything other than wee or semen)
  • lower abdominal pain
  • pain or frequency when you wee
  • pain during sex.

Using condoms

A condom is a rubber sheath which fits over the penis to catch sperm when you ejaculate (come).

Condoms are available in different sizes for a comfortable fit. The right size is less likely to slip off or split.

If you are allergic to latex, then polyurethane condoms are available. Some medicines or lube that you apply to the vagina or penis may affect the effectiveness of condoms. Check with your pharmacist.

All condoms available in Aotearoa New Zealand must pass quality control tests.

How to put on a condom

To help protect against STIs, cover the penis with the condom before it touches the vagina, mouth or anus.

Use a new and lubricated condom each time you have sex

  1. Check the expiry date on the condom packet. If this date has passed, throw the condom away and use one that has not expired.
  2. Open the packet carefully. Fingernails, rings and teeth can tear the condom.
  3. Before the condom comes into contact with the penis, check that the condom is the right way up. Do this by pinching the top of the condom and rolling it down a little. It is the right way up if it rolls down easily.
  4. Continue pinching the top of the condom and roll it onto the hard penis all the way down to the base.
  5. Apply a water-based lubricant, for example, KY Jelly, Wet Stuff, Sylk or Top Gel, to the condom. Oil-based lubricants such as Vaseline can damage condoms.
  6. After you come and when you withdraw, prevent semen from being spilt by holding the condom onto the base of the penis. Remove the used condom from the penis and wrap it in tissue or toilet paper. Put it in the rubbish.

Look after your condoms

  • Store in a cool, dry place and keep away from heat.
  • Keep away from sunlight.
  • Check expiry or use by date before use.
  • Use a water-based lube. Do not use Vaseline, oils or body lotion — these weaken the rubber.

Where to get condoms

You can get condoms from:

  • supermarkets
  • petrol stations
  • pharmacies
  • Sexual Wellbeing Aotearoa clinics
  • sexual health clinics
  • your healthcare provider can provide a prescription.

You can get safer sex oral dams from some Sexual Wellbeing Aotearoa and sexual health clinics, and pharmacies.